Hi Readers
In this blog, I am going to share the best way to avoid the problem & toxic people in our life, I know most of us will not accept this article, but i can say "This is working for me, so I following it and say it". Everyone has there own way to move the life forward.
Signs of Toxic people:
If you need know about toxic people and signs, then here is few points about them,
1. They make you feel bad about who you are.
2. They will make you feel guilty, if they are sad.
3. They always blame you, if you aren't there for them.
This are few points about toxic people character and we need to stay away from such people.
How to handle toxic people?
First, there are many ways to handle toxic people in our life.
1. When we leave them unnoticed, they destroy themself, it's one way.
2. Secondly, if they are in an important relationship with us.
For example, imagine your wife is toxic sometime its happen. Some of my friends & senior saying this to me,"For the past few years, it is so difficult to handle my wife because she is highly toxic". People may say this or you may heard this, "A girl from another house married your own uncle. Then she totally separated him from your family & you. He was so attached to you all i.e. his sister's children like his children, but now there won't be any love and attachment on you all. Now, for you and your family, that girl is a toxic daughter-in-law".
Yeah, that how it work? So, when something bad happen to us and who are all behind it , then they are highly toxic people.
How to handle these people? Very simple and same, first, if you give important to them, what will happen to them? Nothing.
Story from my life:
Here I starting with a short story for you, in our colleges, there was girl, who is quite & normal looking. She would have completed concentrate on her studies and her work. But my friends or other person behind her start saying,"WOW, No girl are like her, dude". They simple increase that normal girl's market to the top and then that girl start feel that and changing for them. From her second year, she start to creating the stories and saying that to others like "She loved ten boys".
In reality is, she would have come from a decent family that might have gone on her own way. But looking at her studies. Four of them join together and increase her market value. Same as many of market person joining to increase the market value or few people join and increase the share market value like boom. Challenges are also the same. How someone is very simple thing, that you make them big and then you spoil your life & others also.
In Reality,
The same thing, when you give important to the toxic people and believe and obey whatever they say. For most people, what happened is when a toxic person is there in a our group, they will treat them like a leader or special. Not to speak with him, he is a big shot, or do not say a word to him, if you do, then he will do that and go and complain that to someone. First, we should never respect them.
For example, when there is some trash in front of you, what will you do? Most of us will say this, "We will clean and dispose it out", isn't it correct? When there is more trash, what you will do? We will clean and dispose it to the municipality. When all are disposing of garages means, how that place will be? Will anyone go to that place? That's it. We can see big garbage depots in the cities.
As the same toxic people's life will change like this. Whoever thinks that they can won by doing the wrong things, but at last they will finally stand alone as orphans. No alternative in it. When you speak about light, how does your mind feel it? Your mind will feel light around you, isn't it? What you speak about darkness, what will happen? You will feel dark.
Imagine, you feel about all happiness like that place with them or celebrating the Christmas, New year, you talk, then what happen? Your mind will have imagine the gifts, family, friend, and dresses. Imagine you talk about that man died, this man died or she run away with him or that went wrong, then what will happen? You feel lousy. Similarly toxic people, the moment you talk about them, then your mind is going to be toxic. Remember now, in the point of handling toxic people, who has become toxic? Say who? We will become it.
So, to handle them is best or there is a concept called " Focus on the Outcomes". Which means we should do is focus on the right outcome. Then what we should do? You have to focus on what you feel is right. In your office, four of them are toxic and three of them are non-toxic & they are good people. You should not focus on the four toxic people. Focus on the other three people.
Another example,
When you are at a bus stop, One rouge is gazing at you in a wrong mind, he does obscene gestures. Then why do you focus on him? A mother with her baby is also there. You can look at the mother or blandish the baby. Whoever does the wrong thing, do toxic things, disturbing us to all these people, whom you are not able to handle. When you happen to see them again, just look at them as trash. It's not even as the trash, just look at them as how you see the gutter.
When you see the gutter, Do you feel anything while seeing the gutter? Do you ever feel like cleaning it? Will you ever dare to clear a gutter? Like a big gutter, most of us won't. Because you will not dare to clean. But you may think you can clean it. Imagine that I am cleaning with bulldozer, Then the same persons will putting back all the garbage again there. If he is the person who always thinks of bad things and thinks only negative, then how can you clean him? When you lit a thousand of candles also, his dirtiness will not change. It is waste of time and money for you.
Think what you have to do right now or at lease now. When you think my wife is toxic, what should I do? Simple & same thing. If that gutter is next to your house, what will you do? That big garbage depot is built next to your house, What will you do? At the first day, you will feel very difficult to stand there. On the second day, you may feel like puking. After one month, two months, one year, what will happen? You will be used of it. Some relation is like that, Gutter at next door.
All you need is used of it. Just get used of it. You cannot come out of it.But there is one opportunity is there, you can change your home and go somewhere else. But remember, the gutter has not chosen you, you chosen the gutter. Is it right? Some relationships are not like it came. Some love each other so much. But after marriage, it becomes tough for them.
It is like, a ghost was wandering on the road, Like in the middle of the road, in a remote forest and heavy rain, a ghost was wandering there. But it didn't look like the ghost. It looked like an angle. How beauty was it? A beautiful angle like you never saw anyone like that. You was having an umbrella and if you has given it to her, it would have gone quietly. By looking at the ghost, we will got attracted because it looks like an angel. He is not aware that it is a ghost. If he has given the umbrella, it would have reached home by itself. What did he done? He asked it to get into his vehicle. After getting into the vehicle, little by little nails started growing. And then the tooth started growing. Nothing can be done, if you feel now? His life is closed.
After bringing your relationship into it and when you start feeling bad about it? It is like haunted by ghosts. Some are male ghosts and some are female ghosts. I don't want to criticize anyone. Then what we should do to the toxic people? What should we do? If you really want to help him or correct them, you have to correct them and go into your other works. We can't keep on cleaning it. either with broomstick or bulldozer. Some thing we cannot clean it or we cannot change certain things. What we can do with garbage? Stay away from the garbage as far as you can, before itself. It is more and more trouble when standing near it. If you have no way to be away from the toxic, there is only one way for it. Eyes can be open, but should not see through your mind. Ears can be open but never listen to their words.
Thanks for your valuable time and reading this article upto end. If you
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